After being so happy yesterday with the return of warm weather, I begin to think about SAD or Seasonal Affective Disorder. (Maybe I have it.)
Everyone knows that nurses, doctors and other medical personnel sometimes think they have every disease they learn about. I have never had that problem, but I like to diagnose myself with personality disorders. Here are the primary ones I have right now:
- OCD: preoccupation with orderliness and perfectionism. I do not like to make less than 100% on a test when I do my continuing education units. If I study a unit that has obscure questions that are not clearly answered in the material, I won't take the test. Why do nurse educators love to ask questions where all the answers are correct, but you have to choose the BEST one?
- Passive Aggressive Disorder: passive sometimes obstructionist resistance to following through with expectations in interpersonal or occupational situations.When someone wants me to do something I don't want to do, I don't want to tell them. I tend to just postpone and avoid it.
- Avoidant personality disorder: pervasive pattern of social inhibition and avoidance of social interaction. I don't like big parties or large groups where I have to talk to people. I don't like the time at church when we stop in the middle of singing and the pastor tells us to go greet people.
- Schiziod Personality Disorder: tendency towards solitary lifestyle. I need time alone and I love being at home by myself.
- Avoidant Personality: fear of anything new or starting relationships. Everytime I get one of those cards in the mail summoning me for jury duty, I try to think of ways to get out of it. I have never been on a jury.
- Dependent Personality Disorder: pervasive dependence on other people. I really like being married. He can do things that I can't do and I don't want to learn how to do them. He knows things that I don't know and I don't want to look them up.
On the other hand, the person I am married to is a counselor and works with people with all these "Disorders" and he never worries that he has them. He thinks he has strange diseases! Maybe we both have Relational disorder: two or more individuals with a disordered "juncture". I'm not sure what that is but maybe we have it.
3 comments:
Thanks for the laugh! I think we all have our disorders, someone with a PHD just decided to put names to them.
This post is hilarious! You aren't crazy. I don't think you have a disorder, either. We are all wired differently. It doesn't make us crazy; it just makes us interesting.
You're so cute. Just think about your poor kids who have to constantly remind themselves that their parents disorders are all in their heads and we don't have to inherit them.
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